


Take My Hand, Don't Let Go

by bubble_bobb



Category: ATEEZ (Band)
Genre: Age Difference, Alternate Universe - Royalty, Denial of Feelings, Dragons, Feelings Realization, First Kiss, First Meetings, Friends to Lovers, Love Confessions, Love at First Sight, M/M, Music, No homophobia but it touches on the subject a lot, Not Beta Read, Prince Kim Hongjoong, Strangers to Lovers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-21
Updated: 2020-03-21
Packaged: 2021-02-28 22:00:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 9,803
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23244427
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bubble_bobb/pseuds/bubble_bobb
Summary: "She's yours now."San says, reaching out to run a gentle finger down the small creature's neck, causing it to close it's eyes and tilt it's head, leaning into his touch."Take care of her, she's a good one."
Relationships: Choi San/Kim Hongjoong
Comments: 3
Kudos: 59





	Take My Hand, Don't Let Go

**Author's Note:**

> Hello!!  
> I hope you enjoy it  
> Lmk what you think by commenting or leaving kudos, both is very much appreciated  
> Remember stay hydrated and stay safe, I love you and byee

Hongjoong's eyes flutter open when he hears a loud knock at his door. He groans quietly, telling the person behind his door to come in once he sits up in his bed, rubbing his eyes sleepily.

He frowns when his father enters the room, a wide and bright smile on his face. An unusual sight for sure. The prince doesn't even get a chance to open his mouth to ask what is happening before his father begins talking.

Hongjoong eventually shifts to the edge of his bed so he can stand up, almost falling back on his bed when his father mentions that his eighteenth birthday is coming up, more specifically in just two days.

He looks at him with narrow eyes. He loved his father to bits just like his mother, but he knew what this all meant and he was not going to agree with a single word that is about leave the king's mouth.

He shakes his head through all that his father says and soon enough he gathers his clothes, wanting to change into his daily clothing. He stares at his father with a slightly raised eyebrow, a silent question spoken between them. His father nods, leaving his bedroom with a quiet "Consider it." and Hongjoong shakes his head again.

He is not going to consider it and he is not going to do anything he was told to do. He is strongly against dragon capturing and his father knows it, everyone does. He is probably the only one around who doesn't support that kind of animal cruelty or animal cruelty in general.

It's disgusting. Animals should be free and not kept in a room, especially dragons. Something so fragile when born and so strong and huge when old is not something to keep at home and yet, all of the royal families he knows owns at least one.

He doesn't understand it, why do people need a dragon anyway? Nobody properly understands them unless they are one. He knows about the famous dragon keeper in the village near by.

His anger was through the roof when he found out someone so close to him was keeping such majestic and beautiful creatures on a damn farm as if they were pigs to point and laugh at.

The man who owns this dragon farm is the one delivering his dragons to families and kingdoms like his own for gold and other important things.

Hongjoong understands that, in a way.

Everyone needs to eat and everyone needs something as valuable as gold to survive. So he understands that but at the same time, why dragons. Dragons are difficult to catch and waiting for a single dragon egg takes several months so is it really worth the wait for just a few coins?

Once he finishes putting on his clothes he steps out of his room, heading towards the staircase.

He looks down, smiling when he notices his mother already standing by the first few steps, waiting for him. He hurries down, bending slightly to peck his mother's cheek.

"Good morning, darling. Did you sleep well?"

She questions and Hongjoong smiles a little, nodding. His mother is such a caring woman it warms his heart to know he has someone like her in his life.

"I did, Ma. Did you?"

The woman nods, smiling at him kindly. He makes his way into the dining room, seating himself close to the doorway into the hall.

His father looks at him from the other side of the table when he begins eating, making him roll his eyes. He takes a small bite and swallows, clearing his throat before shaking his head. He gets up and pushes his chair back in, walking into the hall with a small "Full." leaving him.

He heads for the back door that leads into the garden, stopping by a few old paintings to just stand there and admire them. He doesn't know these people but he knows and loves the paintings they are in.

He loves art, all forms of it. He loves it more than anything, but he can't tell anyone.

His parents want him to become a good king with a good queen one day. He sighs at the thought. If only they knew he had no interest in women.

He then takes a few more quick steps towards the rusty old door, opening it with a little bit of difficulty and revealing the beautiful garden they own. The sound of birds chirping makes him smile and he walks out to explore the sunny garden.

He looks around, smiling fondly at the gardener to let him know he is doing a good job. The gardener smiles back politely, returning to his work right after. Hongjoong then walks towards the wooden arbour that shields his piano from the hot sun, sighing happily.

He usually played when he was in a bad mood, that was also the best time to write his music, but he isn't in a bad mood today. He just feels like playing and he is going to do just that because he has every right to, even this early in the morning.

He sits down at the small bench, brushing his fingers over the keys gently. He sets both hands on the keys later, remembering a melody he wrote not too long ago. He wrote words to go along with it too but he knows he can't let them leave his mouth, not yet.

He starts playing, pressing every key with upmost care and tenderness. God, how he loved his piano. It has always been there when he needed to vent and when everything was too much for him, he could lose himself in the wonderful sound of it's keys and clear his head and that warmed him.

Most of the people around him loved his playing, they encouraged him in pursuing his dream as a musician but his parents weren't happy about that. They let him play but he had to promise he won't try to be a musician. Which hurt, it hurt a lot because he wanted to be one so bad. He can be a good king and a good musician at the same time.

After he finishes playing his ears catch the sound of clapping. He looks around, finding the gardener grinning while clapping his hands, but he is not the only one he heard.

He looks around some more, soon locking gazes with a strange pair of eyes looking at him over one of the tall walls. He frowns a little and in the blink of an eye the mysterious eyes disappear.

He blinks once, twice, three times, trying to figure what he just saw. A human, obviously, but who. He shrugs, maybe he was just imagining things, he hasn't been outside in weeks. He heads back into his home, walking up the stairs heavily. Those eyes. They were real. He wasn't hallucinating. They were real, and beautiful.  
  
  


As night time rolls around Hongjoong stomps his way back downstairs, excitedly seating himself by the dinner table. Their cooks were amazing and he wouldn't trade them for anything in the entire world so to say that he was excited for dinner would be an understatement.

His mother smiles at him, her kind smile and eyes making him feel fuzzy. Once their meals are served Hongjoong's mouth almost waters and he has to hold back to not dig in immediately. He waits for both of his parents to start before eating himself.

It was strange and he never understood why they ate like this but he didn't dare question it. He lost interest in knowing a long time ago anyway. He focuses on his thoughts again, the pair of the beautiful chocolate brown eyes prettily lit by the sunlight he saw earlier in the garden crossing his mind. Who could that have been? Who was watching him? Why were they watching him?

"Have you considered what I told you this morning?"

His father suddenly speaks and he almost chokes on his food, reaching for his glass of water to calm himself down. He doesn't know why he reacted this way, it's unusual, he's usually very focused on his surroundings. He can usually do multiple things at once so he doesn't know why his father's question shocked him like that.

The eyes are really doing things to him.

He shakes his head and clears his throat, looking at his father politely to make sure they are looking at each other while he answers.

"I have, and I don't want to."

"Why not?"

His mother asks from the other end of the table and Hongjoong's heart and head ache, knowing he will either have to explain why he doesn't want it or agree and accept it, which he doesn't want to do, for obvious reasons.

"Mama, Papa, I refuse to have a dragon."

He says simply, his voice still calm but a little more stern. The king frowns, sending a shiver down his spine. He doesn't like this look, it's scary and it makes him afraid of what might come, even though he knows his father would never hurt him.

"But you're going to be eighteen very soon, you need one."

He announces and Hongjoong quickly shakes his head, a displeased groan forcing it's way out of him from the back of his throat.

"No I don't, I don't want-"

"Darling, listen to what your father says."

The queen adds and Hongjoong looks at her with wide eyes, his face showing obvious shock and confusion. He looks between her and his father, a frown setting on his face.

"But, Ma, I don't-"

"Darling, listen to your father."

His mother repeats, now frowning at him softly. It makes him shut his mouth and he looks down in shame. He hates this. He doesn't want or even need a dragon. No one needs a dragon, what for?

"I'm sorry, Papa."

He apologizes quietly and his father hums, setting down his knife down to look at his son properly. It makes Hongjoong a little uncomfortable. This look was the same one his father gave him when they were talking about his future wife, that he will never have, but he doesn't know that.

"So...?"

His father questions, his tone hopeful. Hongjoong sighs, turning his head to look at his mother and then back at his father. He sighs again, deeper. God, he hates this. This is so unnecessary, he does not need a dragon. He would rather just let it go and live it's life, as it should. He swallows, frowning.

"I will take it."

He says quietly after a while, shame filling his head.

"That's my son."

His father announces proudly and Hongjoong grits his teeth. Would he not be if he decided against it?

"Good job, darling."

His mother later says and he nods, continuing in eating his meal with less enthusiasm and appetite. This is going to be hard.

When he finishes dinner he excuses himself to his bedroom, blaming it on tiredness. His parents let him go and he smiles, saying a sweet goodnight to both of them.

He walks up the staircase to his bedroom, plopping down onto his bed, unmannered. He kicks off his shoes and strips down to change into his sleepwear, still thinking about why he needs a dragon. It's not necessary or important, it's just for fun and that's not okay. Once he lies down and closes his eyes the image from earlier today flashes in his mind. Those eyes, those piecing but soft and gentle - looking eyes.  
  
  


The next day he is woken up by the same harsh knocking on his door, an annoyed groan making it's way out of him. He lets the person in, covering his face with a pillow to hide it.

"Your highness, you have a visit."

A visit? This early in the morning? Why? He groans into the pillow, bending his knees to move at least a little bit.

"What time is it?"

He mumbles into the pillow, slowly removing it and sitting up with a tired yawn. He could use a little bit more sleep.

"It's almost one pm, your highness."

His eyes widen and he looks at the servant in shock. The man chuckles, stepping out of his room to let him change. Hongjoong quickly hops out of his bed, putting on his clothing as fast as he can to welcome his visit. That's not what a prince does, what is wrong with him?

He rushes out of his bedroom to finally welcome the awaiting visit, stopping dead in his tracks when the boy looks at him. Those eyes. The same eyes he saw yesterday. They belong to him. He snaps out of his trance rather quickly, wanting to introduce himself first before making any assumptions and confrontations.

He walks over to the boy who is standing by the king's side with a small basket in his hands. Hongjoong raises a curious eyebrow, reaching his hand out to shake the other boy's as he tells him his name.

He can't help the tingling feeling in the pit of stomach when he looks at him properly, noticing all the nice details about him. He looks so utterly gorgeous, it makes Hongjoong think he isn't real for a split second.

His father then sends them off into Hongjoong's bedroom and the prince fights the urge to scoff.

He wasn't allowed to go into his bedroom alone with Seonghwa, his best friend, but he is allowed to be completely alone with a stranger? They walk up the stairs, reaching Hongjoong's room and then it hits him. It's his birthday tomorrow. His eighteenth birthday. Is that basket a gift? What is in it?

They stand in the middle of Hongjoong's room for a moment, awkwardly sharing glances. Hongjoong wants to look, he wants to stare and gaze into those beautiful chocolate eyes but what kind of person does that, more the less a prince like him.

"What's your name?"

Hongjoong questions when the silence becomes unbearable, looking at the other boy in his bedroom. The boy looks up at him in slight shock, wide eyes and pink dusting his cheeks, it makes Hongjoong chuckle quietly.

"San, your highness."

He answers and Hongjoong smiles, running a hand through his messily styled hair. He notices how the other glances up at what he's doing and he smirks in amusement when his cheeks flush darker.

"San, what a pretty name you have."

The older compliments, stepping closer to the other. _A pretty name for a pretty boy._ San takes a careful step back and Hongjoong frowns in confusion, wanting to pull San back but understanding personal space and the no - touch rule.

"Thank you."

The younger man mumbles and Hongjoong sighs, the smile making it's way back on his face. He gently guides San to sit on his bed with him, his heart melting when San smiles at him, dimples decorating his cheeks and eyes forming pretty crescent moons.

"How old are you, my friend?"

"I'm seventeen, your highness."

Hongjoong hums in delight, raising his eyebrows in slight surprise. He laughs, making San look at him with a confused look on his face.

"Seventeen? What a coincidence, so am I, until tomorrow that is."

He chuckles and so does San before they hear a knock at the heavy wooden door, making their heads turn towards the sound.

"Your highness, your father has called you."

Hongjoong nods his head, looking over at San as the man disappears from his room. The other stands up but yelps when he's pulled back again. He looks at the prince in shock, eyes wide and lips parted.

"Your highness-"

He cuts himself off when Hongjoong smiles at him.

"But your father..."

"He can wait."

He tells him, seeing him nod with a shy look in his eyes. Hongjoong then shifts closer, stealing glances of those piercing eyes. He is definitely the same person Hongjoong saw, there is no possible way he isn't.

"So tell me," Hongjoong starts, letting his hand rest on top of the basket handle. "What is this?" He asks softly and San quickly nods, gently pulling off the cloth that was covering what the basket was hiding.

Hongjoong's eyes widen but then his face falls in disappointment, seeing the helpless little dragon shaking in the small prison it was put in. He takes the basket in his hands, looking down into it's curious eyes. Is San one of the sons of the dragon keeper? He heard he had two sons.

"She's yours now."

San says, reaching out to run a gentle finger down the small creature's neck, causing it to close it's eyes and tilt it's head, leaning into his touch.

"Please take care of her, she's a good one."

The younger finishes, looking up into Hongjoong's eyes that are already on him. He blushes a little and Hongjoong's head spins. A few seconds later he remembers his father and stands up while carefully laying the creature onto his bedsheets. San follows, standing up to his feet to leave the prince's bedroom.

"It was a pleasure to meet you, San, have you been paid yet?"

Hongjoong says, bravely reaching for San's hand and bringing it up to his lips to kiss the back of it softly. The gesture was mostly used for women but by the way San's face visibly reddens and he presses his lips tightly together in a thin line, Hongjoong knows he doesn't mind.

"Y-Yes I have, and I loved meeting you also, your highness."

He stutters pulling his hand back. He then makes his way out, followed by one of the servants to help him. Hongjoong watches with a smile, leaning against the wooden staircase railing. He hopes to see San again, talk to him and understand him. After San leaves completely he hurries back into his room to check the reptilian on his bed.

His eyes widen when he steps into his room, the seemingly small dragon now spreading her wings and trying to fly off his bed. He hurries to her, pushing her back and preventing her from falling over. He sighs, sitting down next to the dragon, frowning when he notices how intensely she's watching him.

He turns his head, leaning down to look at her properly. San wasn't lying when he said she is a good one, she didn't even try to bite him. He brings a hand to her head, remembering the way San carefully caressed her neck.

He tries the same, raising his eyebrows at the barely audible pleased noise that leaves the small reptilian.

"Oh yeah, you like that don't you."

He says with a smile, continuing in caressing the dragon's long neck, watching her lean into his touch as well. It feels like he's talking to a dog, using this high pitched version of his voice to make her listen to him.  
  
As much as he didn't want her, he's starting to like her. She's a good dragon, nice and kind of clingy. A little unusual for a dragon. He gently lifts her head to look into her big eyes, still smiling softly. He needs a name.

"Thorn..."

He says, his smile getting wider when the dragon excitedly jumps up to her feet.

"Do you like it?"

He asks as if the dragon could reply and nods to himself. He likes that name too. He then takes the dragon into his hands carefully, lifting her up. She follows his moves, crawling onto his shoulder.

He continues to mess around with her but also doing his daily responsibilities, time flying by like crazy with the dragon by his side. He even goes out for a while, hoping no one will look for him. He then returns into his room when it gets dark, the only source of light in his room being only a candle he lit a few minutes ago and the soft moonlight.

He shrugs, taking his sleepwear and leaving into the bathroom after putting Thorn back in her basket. She almost smiles up at him and his heart melts. He then leaves into the bathroom, washing himself quickly and taking care of everything important.

When he returns Thorn is already asleep and he can't help but stop by her basket and stare down at her with adoration in his eyes. She truly is a gorgeous dragon. Though he feels bad for making her sleep in the basket, she doesn't seem to mind.

He then moves to his bed, getting comfortable under the covers and closing his eyes. He can't wait for tomorrow.  
  
  


When he awakens the only thing he can focus on is the painful headache he is having. He sits up, clutching his head in his hands with gritted teeth. God, he hates headaches with a burning passion.

He shifts to the edge of his bed, shuffling through his night stand to find something to ease his pain. After gulping something down with the help of a glass of water he keeps in his room just in case he gets up, wanting to change.

He quietly changes his clothing, glancing at Thorn that is calmly sleeping in her basket. He smiles, opening his door to go outside and eat breakfast with his family. He walks down the staircase, greeting his parents with a sweet smile, his headache calming down. They mirror the smile, greeting him nicely.

"Good morning darling, did you sleep well?"

His mother asks and Hongjoong nods, deciding on not telling her about the awful headache he had right after he woke up. He turns his head when his father begins speaking, the smile on his face widening.

"What is our birthday boy going to do today? Are you going to play?"

The king asks and Hongjoong excitedly nods his head. He's eighteen now. He's an adult. The prince looks down at his plate, the excitement rushing through his veins.

"I was hoping you would play one of your songs for us today."

His mother says and Hongjoong's eyes almost water. His parents usually didn't care about his music since they didn't want him to be a musician so this really warms his heart. He nods his head carefully, making the queen smile at him.

"And you could sing along to it as well, we'd love to hear you."

His father says and Hongjoong freezes, his heart skipping a beat. That isn't the best idea. He will have to cone up with something during the day so he doesn't have to use any of his already written songs. He can't just start singing about the man of his dreams when his parents don't know about him being interested in men.

After breakfast and some of his morning duties he returns into his room, seeing that Thorn is already awake. He walks over to her, petting her head gently.

"Who's my beautiful little girl?"

He says, continuing in caressing the dragon's body. He smiles when she opens her mouth, almost like a dog, and stares up at him.

"Yes, you are."

He chuckles, sitting down on his bed. He needs to come up with a song, as soon as possible. He grabs his notebook and pen from the other side of his bed, inviting Thorn on his shoulder.

The dragon gladly takes the invitation, climbing up and sitting on his shoulder proudly as he makes his way into the garden. He could think the best outside, by his piano and on fresh air.

He walks down the dark hallway, reaching the back door and slipping outside. He makes his way towards his big piano, sitting down on the bench and letting Thorn down from his shoulder. The dragon respectfully sits down next to the prince, looking up at him curiously.

He takes the torn notebook into his hands, searching for a clean page. His usual inspiration couldn't be used right now. What would his parents think of him if he suddenly started singing about a mysterious pair of eyes watching him or the pretty looking face that delivered him the best gift in the entire world. What would they think of him, if his lyrics weren't _she was beautiful_ but _his_ _beauty shocked me_. What would they say if they knew.

He starts writing, forcing himself to write _she_ instead of _he_ but failing miserably and having to cross and scribble over words because they do not suite a woman.

He sighs after an hour of writing, deciding on just rewriting one of his older songs to match a woman instead of that handsome face he dreams of.

As hours pass by, the sky darkens the slightest bit and his parents come to listen to him play he mentally prepares himself for playing for them. He has to be careful. He can't slip. He looks at the small stool next to the piano with Thorn sitting on it, looking at him with an adorable curious look. It makes him a little less nervous.

When his parents seat themselves on one of the wooden benches around the garden he sets his hands on the keys, the feeling familiar. He gently presses down, looking into his notes while playing. He lets out a shaky breath, parting lips to sing. He's careful. He's paying attention to the words he is saying, he's paying attention to what he's playing and his surroundings.

When he finishes and presses the last key to end his song, he looks up at his parents, hoping to see smiles and proud eyes staring back at him. Instead he gets two shocked faces looking at him in disbelief. His heart drops and a cold shiver runs down his spine.

Was he not careful enough?

Did he slip?

Did he forget something?

His father looks at his mother before standing up and walking over to him and sitting down next to him on the piano bench. He gulps thickly, reaching for Thorn who immediately crawls up his arm to his shoulder.

"Son..." His father starts and Hongjoong can feel the way his whole body is shaking. He couldn't have slipped, he was singing by his text, he was singing every word correctly. He looks at his notes, seeing that his lyrics are just like they are supposed to be, about a woman.

"That was wonderful."

His father finally says and a huge rock falls down from Hongjoong's heart. He didn't slip. He did everything right.

He looks into his father's eyes, finding it a little difficult to do because of the darkness that's starting to set around them. He smiles and thanks him, adding a polite bow of his head.

Minutes later he returns to his room, Thorn still clutching his shoulder in her claws. He sets her down on his bed, kneeling to look at her better.

"I'll be right back."

He tells her, nodding his head at her as he leaves his room again. The halls are quiet and he silently sneaks to the back door, opening it to walk into the garden again and then slip outside the kingdom walls. He sighs, walking quickly into the forest near by, trying to focus on what he is going to do with his life now. He's eighteen, he needs a plan. Just because he is a prince doesn't mean he won't need to do anything, right?

He walks through the forest to the little river that flows just below the hills but stops dead in his tracks when he sees somebody already sitting there. The person turns their head to look to where all the noise is coming from and Hongjoong's head spins.

"Your highness, what are you doing here?"

San asks, shocked. Hongjoong stares at him, frozen in place. He didn't expect this. This was _his_ hiding spot. No one ever went here, that's why he called it _his_. He soon regains control over his body and moves closer to San, sitting down onto the grass next to him.

"I should be asking you the same question, my friend."

He jokes, leaning back on his arms. He doesn't mind San's presence. In fact, he wants him to stay here with him now. He wanted to clear his head to not think about him as much but having San with him directly is better than trying to forget him, at least to him.

"But your highness-"

"Don't call me that," Hongjoong cuts him off before he can even finish, looking at him with sharp narrow eyes. "Call me by my name, San ah, you know my name." He says, turning his head back to look up at the clear and dark sky, how pretty.

"I'm sorry, Hongjoong hyung."

The prince shivers, San's voice ringing in his head, bouncing off the walls with a velvet feel added to it. The commoner's honey - like voice is making him dizzy. He nods without a second thought, sighing.

"How did you find this place?"

Hongjoong asks after a minute of dead silence, wanting to at least know how this happened. How, out of all people, San was the one to find his secret spot.

"It's not far, I stumbled upon it one day and then I just kept coming, to ease my mind."

San explains, closing his eyes with his arms folded behind his head, his figure nicely splayed out on the grass. He's so sharp and at the same soft, it amazes Hongjoong.

"What do you do here?"

San asks, turning his head to look at the older with a curious look on his face, eyes shining prettily.

"Me? I write, my songs and," Hongjoong stops himself, remembering the day he met San. He came here, staring up at the star - filled sky with a stupidly wide grin on his face. He couldn't stop thinking about him as much as he tried to.

He couldn't get the image of his pretty smile and adorable dimples out of his head and it bothered him. San was never to be his and he knew that. It bothered him but he couldn't do much about it, yet. "Do stuff, what about you?"

San smiles, eyes closing.

"Mostly, I just lay down and stare up at the sky, it's calming, really."

He says and Hongjoong nods, gulping thickly while watching San's lips move as he talks. He resists the urge to reach out and touch him and clears his throat instead.

"How do you feel? Doing this, I mean."

He asks, not knowing what he's saying anymore. All he can think about is San and San's face. He wants to know the answers to his questions but just watching San brings him satisfaction.

"Wonderful, peaceful, just... happy."

He says, falling silent again. Hongjoong doesn't really catch what he's saying but he gets an idea of what he might be saying. As rude as he knows it is, he is distracted by something.

He can't help but watch the way San's Adam's apple bobs with every word, the way his lashes perfectly reflect the moonlight and how nice his nose is from his side profile.

As minutes pass and those minutes slowly turn into an hour, Hongjoong notices how quiet San is. He turns to look at him, wanting to compliment him but saving it for later instead.

"Why are you so quiet? Do I make you nervous?"

Hongjoong asks, looking at San teasingly but curiously. The younger hesitates before sighing and nodding his head, still not looking at Hongjoong.

"Y-Yes, a little, I-I'm sorry."

"It's alright little one, I won't hurt you," Hongjoong says, finding himself not being able to tear his eyes away from the younger boy and his face, his eyes and his lips, yet again. He looks like one of those beautiful paintings his family has hung around in their halls. Perfect and flawless.

"I'd do anything to protect you."

He whispers, feeling a little weird saying it but also as if those words were meant to get out. He shakes his head after a minute or two of silence, staring straight up at the glittery sky again.

"Tell me, what are your interests?"

San chuckles, tilting his head back with closed eyes. He clears his throat, staring up at the starry sky with the prince. His happiness makes Hongjoong's heart melt.

"Music, art, any form of it."

He answers, nodding to himself as if he was convincing himself that he likes those things. Hongjoong hums. He gets up on his elbows, looking at San with a soft smile.

"Me too, glad to know I'm not the only one around here who enjoys those things."

San nods, smiling. His eyes flutter open and he turns his head to look at Hongjoong, eyeing him carefully.

"I've heard you play before, it's... breathtaking."

He says quietly, looking shy. Hongjoong smiles, resting his head in his hand. He knows San heard him play. He knows San watched him play. He knows about San liking his music but it still feels nice to hear.

"You think so?"

He asks, wanting his tone to sound teasing but it comes out a little too sweet. _Damn_.

"Yes, I love it."

San confirms, nodding his head cutely, his black locks falling into his eyes. Hongjoong has to hold himself back from pushing the strands of hair behind his ears and freeing his eyes to look into them again.

"It's your birthday today, correct?"

Hongjoong nods his head, his eyes noticing every little detail on San's face.

"Happy birthday, hyung."

San says, making the hair on the back of Hongjoong's neck stand up. He smiles a little, thanking San verbally and with a bow of his head, his eyes still locked on San's face.

"How's your dragon by the way, did you name her yet?"

San snaps him out and he quickly nods, searching around in his head for the right words to say.

"I did, she's very lovely and calm, her name is Thorn."

He says smiling. Thorn is way more playful and calm than he expected. He was expecting a dangerous little dragon that would destroy half of his room before he even turned around but Thorn is different. She's patient and intelligent. She's a fast learner and everything Hongjoong has taught her she already masters. She's perfect just like the boy who delivered her.

"I'm glad you're getting along."

San says, sighing. He looks almost sad, it breaks Hongjoong to see him like that. It hurts to see him not smiling.

"You can come see her if you want to."

San looks at him with hope in his eyes, smiling and excitedly nodding his head. Hongjoong gets lost in that precious smile, hoping to never see it leave San's face. He looks up and his face drops when he sees one of his close servants walking around on the other side of the bridge that led to his- their secret spot.

"Let's meet again."

He hurries out, startling the young commoner a little bit. San takes a moment before nodding, sitting up properly.

"Alright."

"Be here tomorrow, wait for me, I'll come as soon as the sun sets, promise."

Hongjoong tells him, looking down at him one last time before running off, making his way back home.

The way back isn't long, he knows exactly how and where to go to get home fast, avoiding a yelling. As soon as the kingdom comes into view he sighs, slipping in the big hole in their garden fence and then inside through the back door.

He looks around at the paintings, remembering San. Perfect and flawless.

He hurries up the staircase into his bedroom, slipping in and greeting Thorn as soon as he sees her still sitting on his bed.

Few minutes after getting comfortable on his bed and having Thorn crawl to him he hears loud footsteps approaching his room before his father bursts inside, looking upset.

"Where were you?!"

He asks harshly and Hongjoong flinches back, smiling a little to himself. They noticed?

"What do you mean?"

He asks calmly, watching his father's face heat up even more. He looks like he might lose it at any point in time but he doesn't care. He can't bring himself to for some reason. He's acting bratty and he knows it, but he doesn't care.

"Where did you go?!"

His father questions, a little less harsh but still stern. Hongjoong sighs.

"Relax, I was here the whole time, I was training Thorn."

He says, caressing the dragon's back and neck carefully. His father scoffs, reaching for the door to open it wider. He looks at Hongjoong through his lashes, making a shiver run down his spine.

"Next time, you won't go anywhere unless you tell me where you're headed and when you're going return."

Hongjoong takes a moment for the words to sink in, his eyes widening when he finally understands. He sits up carefully, aware that he still has Thorn resting on his chest.

"You can't-"

"There's nothing I can't do, I'm your father and you are going to listen to what I say, I don't care that you are an adult now, I am your father."

The king cuts him off before nodding to himself and leaving the room, shutting the door loudly. The bang makes Thorn lift her head and Hongjoong shushes her softly. He's not going to listen. He doesn't care. He's going to see San again tomorrow, no matter what.  
  
  


The next day is something he will never get used to. People giving him gifts was always something he disliked because he never knew how to react. He also thought he did not deserve all of this attention. He loved his family, obviously, but he didn't want their gifts. He wanted acceptance and love, not gifts.

No one knows about his true self and it's slowly but surely eating him alive. He wants to tell them, tell everyone that he is himself and that won't change. He wants them to love him, no matter his preferences and choices. But he is pretty sure that won't happen, ever.

During the day he gets to meet distant relatives that speak barely any Korean and he has to use his poor Japanese to talk to them, but he likes them. Two of the Japanese relatives are his two years older twin cousins, very lovely individuals.

The little he remembers from when he last met them is when they were playing in his bedroom with paper cut outs of dragons and princesses and knights they had to save. Now that he thinks back to it, he isn't that surprised that the girl later turned out to be into women and men. Not to mention himself. It's a little funny to think about.

He shows off Thorn, being a little anxious about letting her see so many people at once but she holds it perfectly. She is as nice as usual, climbing all over Hongjoong to show off how flexible she is. It makes Hongjoong laugh at how silly she could be when she was playful. She couldn't bring herself to fly yet but Hongjoong is okay with it. He will give her as much time as she needs.

The day passes quickly and before anyone can notice it's almost seven pm and the sun is setting. Hongjoong looks out of one of the windows, watching as the sun slowly sets. He's going to meet him again. He's not letting his father stop him from meeting him.

He patiently waits until all of his family leaves and then excuses himself from his parents, telling them he doesn't feel well and that he is going to go to bed early. His parents let him, wishing him their last late happy birthday before letting him go up the staircase and into his room.

Once in his room Hongjoong looks out of his window, nodding to himself. His bedroom was high from the ground but there were things that would help him down, like the gardener's ladder.

He puts Thorn into her basket, wishing her a good night before climbing out of his window. With a shaky breath he tries to reach for the ladder, sighing victoriously when his foot touches it. He then proceeds to carefully get down and then outside of the kingdom walls again.

He hurries to his and San's hiding spot, thanking everything around him that he can still see and that it's not completely dark yet.

Tired and out of breath he finally gets to his destination, smiling and regaining all of his strength when he sees San lying on the grass with his hands crossed behind his head.

"You came."

San says when he notices the prince and sits up, his eyes shining in the low light of the moon that's beginning to show up on the night sky. Hongjoong smiles.

"I promised, didn't I."

He says, sitting down next to San's figure. The younger smiles at him, quietly asking him about his day. Hongjoong smiles back, telling him all of the not so interesting things that happened to him that day. San listens to him with his head resting in his arms that are placed on top of his knees and Hongjoong feels his heart flutter. Weird.

When he stops talking he turns his whole body to face San. The younger unfolds his arms, grinning at him. Hongjoong smirks before getting a little closer.

"Are you laughing at me?"

He asks with a raised eyebrow, still smirking. The younger shakes his head but the grin never leaves his face, his eyes forming pretty crescent moons.

"You are!"

He says while laughing, moving to straddle the younger. San looks up at him with wide eyes while giggling, his hands on Hongjoong's shoulders. The act is innocent and friendly in a way but Hongjoong can't help and feel this weird tingling feeling in his stomach when he looks down at San's face. This angle makes him look even prettier.

He leans a little closer, not exactly knowing why but doing so anyway. San's smile gets a little smaller but it doesn't leave his face just yet. He looks up into Hongjoong's eyes with a soft smile tugging at the corners of his lips.

The smile only falls off when Hongjoong leans even lower, cupping his cheek before connecting their lips. He doesn't know why, it just felt right to do.

The kiss doesn't last long but it's enough to leave them both breathless. Hongjoong pulls back, panting while looking down at San with his eyes tearing up just the slightest bit.

"Why did you do that?"

San asks, his eyes hooded as he stares up at the prince. Hongjoong gulps thickly, shaking his head unnoticeably. He leans a little closer, making San tilt his head up.

"I don't know."

He answers truthfully, his hand still resting on San's warm cheek. San breathes out harshly, his eyes traveling back to Hongjoong's parted lips. He licks his own, trapping his bottom lip between his teeth for a second before speaking.

"Can I have more?"

Hongjoong nods almost immediately, carefully leaning in again. He hums when San wraps his hands around his neck, gently caressing his jaw with his fingers. He makes himself a little more comfortable in their current position, tilting the younger's chin up to deepen the new kiss.

He can feel the younger trembling under him, he can feel how nervous San is. He pulls back after a few seconds, causing the commoner to chase after his lips. He chuckles, staring down at San with blown pupils.

The prince runs his fingers through the other's hair, a soft smile spreading across his face.

"You're so pretty..."

He unintentionally breathes out, freezing when he realizes what just left his mouth. He didn't admit it to himself yet but he likes San, obviously. The younger was just too beautiful and kind to not adore immediately.

San giggles, adorable dimples melting Hongjoong's insides. He's feeling a little weird. Maybe it's because he knows he shouldn't be here but the feeling is almost too much. Maybe it's that he is finally not denying his interest in San. But what if the younger doesn't like him? What if he just felt bad so he carried on with the kiss?

He leans down again to press a soft kiss to San's forehead before wrapping his arms around his waist and embracing him tightly. He feels strange doing this. Something isn't right. He feels hot all over and his head is spinning, but it feels like he is supposed to be here, right now, doing this.

San returns the action, sighing into his neck. Hongjoong's eyes widen when he feels San press a feather light kiss to the side of his neck, followed by another one. He pulls back, looking down at the younger in shock.

The commoner smiles, tilting his head and silently telling Hongjoong to do the same. He raises his brows as a quiet _Are you sure?_ and San nods, his eyes fluttering close as Hongjoong leans down.

The prince trails kisses down his neck and along his jaw, scraping the sensitive skin with his teeth and pulling a quiet whine from San's mouth. He looks at him from the corner of his eye, repeating the move just to hear San's breath hitch and a silent moan slip out.

He then sits up, earning a whiny call of his name. He shakes his head, switching positions with San and pulling the younger into his lap.

"Maybe some other time, Sannie."

He whispers, running a hand through San's hair. He doesn't know what they're doing. They have been talking for only about two days, what if this all turns out to be a big mistake. That would break him.

He stays in the same position with San for several minutes, only realizing San fell asleep when he calls out his name and the younger doesn't answer him. He smiles. He's not in a hurry anyway, home can wait.  
  
  


When he returns home hours later he can't bring himself to care if anyone sees or hears him. His head is filled with San and San only. The way he looked at him when he straddled him or the way he tasted. He makes his way straight into his room, planning on collapsing and sleeping until he is forced to get up.

He opens the door into his room, stopping dead in his tracks when he sees his father sitting on his bed.

"Not feeling well, huh?"

His father says and Hongjoong's heart drops.

"I said you're going to tell me if you want to go out and wait if I allow it."

His father says, standing up to walk closer to Hongjoong. The prince looks up at his father with fear deep in his eyes. His father has never hit him but he was the scariest out of all the people on the planet when angry.

"You don't need to be scared."

The king said and Hongjoong just stared back, not daring to move or speak.

"I just don't trust you anymore," he says and Hongjoong's heart breaks. He messed up. "You're not going to be alone for even a second from now on, just prepare for that."

"Hongjoong," the king calls out, not looking at him. Hongjoong turns his head a little, his eyes watering. "I'm disappointed."

His father says, opening the door to walk out. Hongjoong looks over his shoulder, sniffling. He messed up, big time. He knows his father is a man of his word and that makes him angry. He looks over at Thorn after a while of just standing in the middle of his room, wanting to just check up on her before going to bed.  
  
  


For the next two or so weeks he really doesn't have a second of privacy, only when he uses the restroom he is allowed to be alone, thankfully. It makes him mad, having a servant following him around like a shadow was starting to piss him off.

He told himself he could take it when it started but towards the end of second week he started feeling like he couldn't take it any longer. He excused himself into the restroom one day and when he shut the door he tried to figure out how to squeeze out from the window that was high above everything.

He hasn't seen or talked to San in so long and his heart aches at the thought that San might not want to talk to him anymore. The thought that the younger might think Hongjoong isn't interested in him anymore.

He gives up on squeezing through the window after a while, instead hoping that the servant would walk away or just do something so he could-

"You highness, please hurry."

In that moment Hongjoong thanks to all of the Gods above, quickly making his way out of the restroom and letting the servant in.

"Please stay here, your highness."

The servant says before closing the door and locking it. Hongjoong sighs victoriously, running into his room to try and find Thorn.

When he spots her asleep in her basket his heart melts. He tries to wake her up with sweet words, thankfully succeeding. He takes the small reptilian into his arms and gets on his way, running down the hall to the back door so no one could catch him. He slips outside with the dragon still in his arms and then gets on running.

He looks up, watching as the sun sets. San might still be there. He then makes the, now fully awake, dragon sit on her favourite spot, his shoulder, speeding up to get to his destination faster. He needs to talk to him. He needs to apologize. He needs _him_.

When he gets close he slows down, noticing the gorgeous black locks contrasting with the milky white skin of the person sitting on the grass in their spot.

He quickly runs through the big hole that allowed him to get there, making sure Thorn doesn't get hurt as he makes his way to San.

"Hongjoong hyung!"

San jumps up excitedly, wanting to hug Hongjoong but stopping when he notices Thorn sitting on his shoulder. Hongjoong pulls him closer, pressing their lips together gently. He missed this. After a few seconds he pulls back, looking at San and the way his face flushes.

"Why weren't you coming... I was worried about you..."

San says with teary eyes, whispering towards the end of his sentence with his eyes drifting away. If Hongjoong wasn't paying attention it would go straight past him. But he hears him loud and clear and his heart skips a beat. He feels awful for just leaving San like that but he has his reasons.

"I wasn't allowed."

He says softly and San looks up in shock.

"You weren't allowed to... see me?"

He asks and Hongjoong shakes his head.

"And you are now?" Hongjoong shakes his head again and San's eyes widen. "The kingdom must be looking for you." He says, looking shocked.

"Yeah, well, I don't care." Hongjoong say, noticing the way San's face drops and his heart breaks. He's being harsh for no reason.

"I'm sorry."

"Don't be, I'm sorry."

Hongjoong says quickly after San's apology, bringing him closer again. San follows, sitting down with him and laying his head on Hongjoong's thighs, looking up at him with sparkly eyes. He smiles a little bit when he notices Thorn sitting on Hongjoong's shoulder, looking down at them with her signature look. She is still so small.

"What are you going to do now?"

He questions, clearly concerned. Hongjoong sighs. He didn't think about that, in fact, he didn't think about anything when he got on his way. The only thing he thought about was San and Thorn and that's exactly why she's here with him.

"I don't know."

He says, feeling his eyes tear up. _What is he going to do now?_ Nothing, he guesses. Stay here, stay with Thorn and try to survive. Maybe he's going to go back, but how is he going to explain himself?

"You can stay with me."

San says after a while, looking up at Hongjoong with sincere eyes. Hongjoong looks down at him in shock. No, he can't. He can't use San like that.

"Really?"

He questions and San quickly nods his head.

"Yes! I don't mind and my brother and father don't care."

He says, genuine eyes looking deep into Hongjoong's. The prince's eyes tear up before a few tears escape, his heart skipping a beat or two. He still can't believe someone so incredibly beautiful and sweet like San exists. He can't believe San exists.

"San ah... thank you."

He says, pulling the young man into a tight hug. San returns it, sighing into his shoulder and mumbling something Hongjoong can only assume is _"No problem, hyung."_

And then San finally takes him home. It's shocking at first, seeing all of the different dragons just peacefully sleeping. He lets Thorn join them, telling her to be careful even though he knows she doesn't understand a single word he says.

The younger leads him to his room, showing him where his closet is and telling him that if he needs anything then he can just tell him and he'll try to help. It confuses Hongjoong at first but he understands when San begins waking away. He gently grabs him by his wrist, stopping him before he can even reach the door.

"Where are you going?"

He asks and San frowns a little bit. It makes Hongjoong frown as well, never seeing the younger like this before.

"Into a different room?"

He tells him, pointing to the door. Hongjoong frowns a little deeper.

"Why?" He asks, feeling stupid after the word leaves his mouth. And he calls himself a prince?

San giggles.

"If you want me to stay you can just say it."

San whispers and Hongjoong feels his cheeks and neck heat up, a wide smile making it's way on his face.

"Will you stay here with me? Please?"

He asks and San nods, laughing. They change into something more comfortable, slipping under the covers. The bed is nowhere near close to being enough for both of them but the somehow make it work, warming each other up thanks to being so close.

Hongjoong sighs when San falls asleep, staring at the back of San's head. Why did San offer to help him? He wasn't talking to him for over a week and San is still treating him so nicely.

The days that follow make Hongjoong a little anxious but he grits his teeth and tries his best every time. San's father turned a blind eye and his brother seriously couldn't care less about him so that makes him happy.

He dresses in San's clothes for the time he is planning on staying, finding out that the younger's clothes fit him perfectly. He comes out only if absolutely necessary or with San by his side, keeping his eyes locked on the ground wherever they go.

It feels nice if he's completely honest with himself. It feels good when he can just live without people putting the label _prince_ on him. He can basically do everything he was told not to when he was growing up. He can enjoy life without anyone telling him he's doing something wrong. Yes, he misses his parents but they made him do this in the first place, mostly his father.

As the few days Hongjoong said he would stay for turn into weeks, San pulls him aside to talk to him about the things he wants to do next. He tells him he doesn't mind Hongjoong there in the slightest but he should let somebody know that he isn't dead as most of the people that are looking for him think he is. It makes Hongjoong laugh, even though he knows how horrible that is, it's funny to him.

"You need to go and tell them."

San says and Hongjoong scoffs. Go and tell them? Be captured and basically never let out again? He sits down on San's bed, looking away.

"I'm not going back unless you are going with me." He says quietly.

"Why?!"

San questions and Hongjoong looks back, nervously chewing on his bottom lip. He doesn't know if he should say it or not. Well, he already started so he might as well finish.

"I," he starts, feeling his hands shake and head spin. "I think I'm in love you." He says, not daring to look into San's eyes or see his face at all. He's afraid San won't accept him. He's afraid San is going to be disgusted by him. He's afraid San doesn't feel the things he does. He never complained when they kissed and he never said anything about the way Hongjoong acted towards him but what if that meant nothing to him? When Hongjoong doesn't hear a single sound come from San he sighs, wanting to explain himself.

"I always get this feeling when we are together that I don't get with anyone else and I do not expect you to feel the same way San ah," He says, sighing again. His head feels like it's about to explode but he keeps going. His heart is starting to feel a little better. "But I hope we can keep things the way they are and remain friends, just please, stay with me, I can't be without you, I don't want to lose you."

"I like you too."

San blurts out once Hongjoong finishes and he has to look up to confirm San isn't joking. He could always tell if people lied by their eyes but San's seem, genuine, truthful.

"Really?"

He asks, standing back up to be at eye level with the younger and stepping closer to him. San only nods, also looking afraid. Hongjoong smiles, laughing at how stupid they both are. He leans a little closer, knowing he should be focusing on the things that are more important but being distracted by something way more appealing.

"Can I kiss you?"

"Yes please."

And that's all it takes for Hongjoong to lean in, pressing their lips together. He smiles against San's mouth, realizing this is their very first shared kiss after their confessions, so he should make it a little special.

He cups San's face in one hand, the other set on his hip as he walks back until the boy's back meets one of the walls. San pulls back from the prince to take a breath, looking at him with hooded eyes. Hongjoong smiles.

"Come with me?"

He asks and San can only nod before pulling him back to connect their lips again.

**Author's Note:**

> Talk to me on Twitter? (ateezlvruwu)  
> I'd love to be friends with you ^^


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